Contrary to the sweet-sounding title, the 1999 flop, Jawbreaker, directed by Darren Stein, leaves a face-scrunching sour taste in the mouth. The film’s plot follows anti-heroine Courtney Shayne, portrayed by Rose McGowan, who accidentally murders her best friend, the perfect Liz Purr, (Charlotte Ayanna) by gagging her with a jawbreaker and taking her on a bumpy ride to get pancakes. Aside from Mcgowan’s Shakespearean-esque dialogue, this plot holds itself together worse than lip gloss. But who needs a cohesive storyline when you have the looks? While the Flawless Four (three, minus Purr), have some outstanding costumes that highlight their characters’ motivations and personalities, I think we find the most stunning wardrobe in geek-turned-goddess Fern Mayo (Judy Greer) who accidentally stumbles upon the remaining Flawless Three discussing how to cover up Liz Purr’s untimely demise. Fern quickly rises to power, but not before a true-to-form ‘90s showcase of solid pink outfits sent from the gods.

The film’s costuming kicks into high gear after this pivotal moment in the diabolically fabulous transformation of Fern Mayo into her all-powerful alter-ego ‘Vylette.’ This bitchin’ blonde updo and myriad shades of pink wardrobe replace the earth tones and terribly styled brown wig. Her inexplicably acquired wardrobe includes a mini tee emblazoned with “bitch,” vinyl tube tops, and neck scarves reminiscent of a modern Grease’s Pink Ladies. Vylette’s influence expands beyond the rosy repertoire as she seduces a boy to obtain a Corvette that she is eventually somehow able to park directly in front of the school in a barely subtextual display of power. Vylette’s dominion over her classmates directly correlates with her meteoric rise in hotness. Femininity is power in this film. Our teen dreams do not dress like their peers in the slightest. The actors' ages show in their devastatingly sharp cheekbones, kitten heels, and busty blouses sported throughout the film. Ms. Sherwood, their teacher, is the only one who briefly critiques these fashion choices by saying, “Please, cover your bosoms. This is a learning institution, it's not a brothel.” Their lunches, consisting of a diet coke adorned with a bendy straw on a lunch tray, create an undeniably iconic image for the time. “We eat and we eat well. We just don't eat in public.” The film never explains where they stash their homework and books in those mini purses, but I’d like to know. I found it virtually impossible to suspend my disbelief that these were not actual students, but rather models sent to the school to impersonate teenagers.

Regardless, if I were in their presence, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from worshiping the laminate tile that these fashionistas walked on. The costuming in this movie has a timeless feel, mixing influences across multiple decades to set in this multicolored world of terror. Every one of the Fab Four has this signature look that suits their respective archetype. For a majority of the film, Courtney wears this purple fifties-era hellcat attire with a big updo, kitten heels, scarf, and signature cardigan, but there are a few scenes when she’s decked in all red to exemplify the devil-in-heels motif. Marcie fulfills the forgettable lapdog archetype in her nauseating chartreuse palette. Her father rightfully worries that his daughter is a “follower.” Marcie is a sell-out, and the most unsatisfying aspect of the movie is that Marcie never gets her comeuppance for her undying loyalty to Courtney. Possibly the most inspired utilization of fashion in the film comes in Julie’s costuming journey. She begins the film as another Plastic, à la Gretchen Weiners, but in her transformation to an independent power of good against Courtney’s tyrannical reign, she transitions from the supermodel get-up to a more relaxed, whimsical baby blue palette. Her clothes take a turn from the manicured mini dresses to a more relaxed round shape with softer edges in an oversized denim jacket and bell bottoms. This directly contrasts Fern Mayo’s transformation from wearing a swamp green fit ill-fitted for Judy Greer’s build into her Barbie doll makeover. In a makeover montage that is tragically cut from the final movie, Courtney seizes complete control over Fern Mayo’s identity and sends her in a fuschia tailspin into the world of the beautifully evil.

The "femininity is power” theme extends well past the girls’ wardrobe. In one scene, Courtney pressures her jock boyfriend to perform fellatio on a popsicle. She is the dominant figure in the sex scene and the man is made subject to her fantasy. The women in this movie command sexuality over each other as well. I feel like if Vylette were to read the Compulsory Heterosexuality masterdoc, her confusion over her extreme feelings for Liz Purr may have had a very straightforward explanation. Vylette is impassioned to bring Liz her homework and has a monologue about the things she loves about Liz all the way down to the smell of her hair, inspired only by a brief encounter where Liz helped Vylette pick up her books one day. If only a comprehensive GoogleDoc was available to her that could explain why she has no interest in boys and only fills her mind with poetry about the high school beauty queen. To quote director Darren Stein in an interview with Entertainment Weekly, “I embrace Fern’s sexual ambiguity. People get obsessed and aren’t sure if they are gay or just obsessed.” The parasocial love story completes itself with breaking and entering into Purr’s home, nonstop thoughts of Liz’s perfection, and a disturbing yonic flower metaphor.

The rags-to-riches horse girl transformed into a beauty queen detracts the movie’s A-plot of covering up a murder from detective Pam Grier, in a truly exceptional ‘foxy’ cameo, attempts to interview the murderesses in vain for a very short stint of the movie before completely fading into the background. Although Courtney is facing an investigation for conspiracy, accidental death, and tampering with a crime scene, she insists that being the queen bee is the top of her priorities. I mean, what’s more entertaining than murder? Being popular in high school, of course!

Even with plot holes big enough to pop a tire on your 1980 Chevrolet Corvette C3, this movie’s costuming, rhetoric, and soundtrack take the viewer on a wild ride of sex, crime, and the dramatic struggles of being a high schooler climbing the social ladder at any cost.

Roses are Red, Vylette’s are PINK in 1999’s Jawbreaker