Thanksgiving Throwdown: HOME SWEET HOME vs BLOOD RAGE
When I think of Thanksgiving, I think of anxiety. While this holiday may not play out in the same way for everyone, it generally includes being forced into an uncomfortable food-filled gauntlet with people that you probably only see a few times a year. You trudge your way through an onslaught of small talk, using every ounce of energy to maintain the facade of a person who is not already completely exhausted. You feign enthusiasm and try your best to conceal your social anxiety as you meander your way around the serving table. Is that only me? Oh, well. Thanksgiving takes it out of me and I can only assume that it does that to you as well.
After seemingly endless hours have passed and you’ve dulled your senses with every known possible variety of casserole, you start to slink slowly into a catatonic delirium. While your family moves the conversation to the topic of politics and you realize that your pants might be feeling a bit too snug, you spirit yourself away into the empty TV room. Too full to lose consciousness, but also too full to move off of the couch, your hand slowly brushes against your old standby, the remote. “Hey there, buddy,” you think.
With that canned cranberry sauce that nobody likes slowly drying on the front of your jeans, you begin to flip through your options. Replay an episode of an old NBC sitcom that you’ve seen over a hundred times? Not today. Maybe something new on Netflix that the whole family could enjoy? Nope. That would alert the folks in the other room to my presence and would break this excellent coma thing that I have going on. Not today, Satan.
You know what you need. A movie that matches the “dumpster fire that just got pushed into a pool” feeling that is currently gurgling inside of your gut. A film from a bygone era teeming with sex and violence and completely lacking in most things that any film critic or member of the general public would look for in a movie—direction, a semblance of a plot, and what would traditionally be considered “good” acting. Something that you can lightly chuckle at while your body focuses most of its energy on digestion. You need a golden nugget of VHS horror slime to keep your heart rate up while you and your aunt’s couch slowly merge into one giant microfiber monstrosity. The problem is, which forgotten holiday horror gem will most compliment your descent into tryptophan-fueled madness?
Counter to popular belief, there are actually many Thanksgiving-themed horror movies that meet the bulk of the aforementioned criteria. There’s multiple listicles out there covering the topic and so I’ll just give you the 10,000 foot view. 1971’s BloodFreak or the more recent ThanksKilling series are excellent and odd, both filled with unique kills and interesting practical effects. Kristy (2014) and Alien Abduction: Incident in Lake County (1998) are both deeply unsettling films that also happen to occur on the fourth Thursday in November. With Eli Roth rumored to be turning his fake grindhouse trailer for Thanksgiving into a real movie and the recent Pilgrim release from Blumhouse and Hulu garnering acclaim amongst horror fans, there is no dearth of scary flicks utilizing this particular holiday as its backdrop.
But today is not meant to be a discussion of those films. Today, we are applying a critical eye to, in my opinion, the two best Thanksgiving slasher flicks to have ever graced the dollar bin at your local Ma and Pa movie store—Home Sweet Home (1981) and Blood Rage (1987). Both pictures are set on Thanksgiving and feature an escaped mental patient, an unlucky family, and a whole lot of creative kills. But which film in this deep-fried double feature should receive the coveted top billing? Which of these two low-budget juggernauts is the most deserving of the drumstick of glory? Who will reign supreme on this turkey day to end all turkey days? I’m so glad that you asked.
Home Sweet Home (1981)
Rating: 🦃🦃🦃
[TRAILER]
Where do I even begin with this one? I think I should start by saying that, at least in my mind, there are two types of people in this world: those who love bad movies and those who do not. If you find yourself falling into the first camp, then this movie is going to be a real Thanksgiving treat for you. If you find yourself struggling when characters are entirely devoid of motivation and entire sections of dialogue are mismatched and delivered via ADR, then maybe sit this one out.
This movie is just plain insane the whole way through. Also released under the titles Bloodparty and Slasher in the House, the plot of Home Sweet Home follows Jay Jones, a muscle-bound escaped mental patient and PCP addict, played by Body by Jake—Jake Steinfield, as he breaks out of the local asylum and immediately sets out on a blood soaked mission to annihilate the Bradley family during their Thanksgiving dinner. You might find yourself asking, “Why would someone do such a thing to this unlucky family? A previous perceived slight? A blood feud perhaps?” To be honest, I have no idea. I’ve seen this movie multiple times and you’re about as close as I am to an answer.
What I love about this movie is that it doesn’t burden itself with the “why’s.” It’s a smash mouth story that jumps straight into the gore. In the first five minutes of this flick, we see our killer strangle a random motorist, steal his vehicle, and immediately inject PCP into the main vein underneath his tongue. He then maniacally laughs (something that he does the entire movie) as he plays real life Grand Theft Auto with every pedestrian (grandma’s included) that has the severe misfortune to cross his path. Solid start.
In the remaining 75-ish minutes, we meet the Bradley family and the menagerie of characters that is joining them for their Thanksgiving feast. This grouping includes a few problematic depictions of hyper-sexualized female stereotypes and a mime soldier in the Kiss Army who is constantly using his incessant electric guitar playing to interrupt couples trying to get busy. Almost everyone in the movie is unlikeable, but that’s okay. We’re not here to make friends. We’re here to watch gory cheese.
One by one, Jay slowly picks off each member of the group in increasingly ludicrous ways. While checking under the hood of an abandoned car, the patriarch of the Bradley family, Harold, is crushed by a flying Jay who literally belly flops the poor guy to death. Later, the previously mentioned mime, lovingly named “Mistake” in this film, is electrocuted to death by his own portable guitar amp. SO damn good.
While a good deal of this film could easily be considered obnoxious, incoherent garbage, I think it is a really fun watch and an appropriate addition to your annual Thanksgiving holiday traditions. Directed by Nettie Peña (Dracula Sucks) and featuring appearances from Don Edmonds (Director of Ilsa, She Wolf of the S.S.) and Vinessa Elizabeth Shaw (Hocus Pocus and Eyes Wide Shut), this spastic, unfocused deathride to Valhalla manages to overcome its ineptitude while showcasing a little bit of talent and a lot of heart.
Blood Rage (1987)
Rating: 🦃🦃🦃🦃
[TRAILER]
“Well, looks like you’re going to get a chance to meet the rest of the family because my psychotic brother just escaped ... Could you pass the green beans, Mom?”
Much like Home Sweet Home, Blood Rage features a plot that is driven by an escaped psychotic killer who targets a family during their Thanksgiving meal, only with a slight twist.
In Blood Rage, we meet a set of twin boys, Terry and Todd, nestled in the backseat of a car parked at a drive-in theatre. While the twins sleep, their mother (portrayed by Louise Lasser) is getting in some serious necking action with her new beau in the front seat. After understandably being a little put-off by the fact that his mom is going at it with a stranger two feet away, Terry sneaks off, finds a hatchet in the bed of a nearby truck and takes to slicing up a couple of strangers mid-coitus in their car. Rather than being blamed, however, Terry sticks the hatchet in the hands of his twin brother, Todd, who is frozen with fear and unable to explain the horror that he had just witnessed.
With Todd being blamed for the double homicide and carted off to a mental institution, the film fast forwards ten years. We find Terry still living with his mother and once again triggered when he learns that mommy dearest has a new fiancé. It is at this same moment that the group learns that Todd has escaped from the confines of the asylum and is likely headed their way. Things kind of devolve from there into a series of gruesome kill scenes, confusing character reactions, and dialogue that hints at unexplored plot lines as Terry revives his murderous ways while Todd works to stop his brother and clear his name. It’s a whole lot of fun.
Both Terry and Todd are played by Mark Soper, so the whole movie has a kind of Parent Trap meets a cruddy ’80s slasher thing going on, which actually works out really well in this case. Soper plays each character a bit differently, adding distinctive flourishes to his delivery as Terry to portray him as entitled, nonchalant, and vacant, while Todd is depicted as disheveled and naive. Terry even has his own catch phrase of sorts, smirking to himself, “Well, that’s not cranberry sauce” everytime he sees the result of his own bloody handiwork.
While this movie definitely features some awkward acting, and really odd narration by Todd’s therapist, the movie never loses momentum as each kill builds upon its predecessor. At one point, Terry decapitates Bill (played by makeup effects artist Ed French) and I have to say that the head is one of the most beautifully executed (pun intended) practical effects that I have seen in a low-budget slasher from this era.
Also released under the titles Nightmare at Shadow Woods and Slasher, this movie is cheesy as hell, but in that absurdity, we find more redeeming qualities than damning. I mean, Ted Raimi even makes a split second cameo as a weirdo with condom-filled pockets. That has to say something about this movie, right? With multiple nuanced performances, a solid soundtrack, nudity that isn’t overwhelming, and surprisingly considerate cinematography, Blood Rage is a fun ride and is probably more deserving of a place at your Thanksgiving table than your uncle who has all of those interesting opinions that come out as he progresses his way through that third bottle of mulled wine.
Check it out. I promise I’m not goofin’ you.
Verdict
Despite having somewhat similar plots, both of these films tackle horror in curiously novel and enjoyable ways. While chronologically, Blood Rage may seem like a pastiche of Home Sweet Home, they both feature unique takes on the holiday-set slasher genre that Black Christmas pioneered years before. Both films get right to the carnage, neither takes itself too seriously, and both manage to hold your attention for their entire respective duration (a feat that can be quite difficult in the age of iPhones).
While I love both films individually, Blood Rage just comes across as a more coherent and clear story in the end, while Home Sweet Home’s plot is just as berserk as the killer driving it forward. Blood Rage seems like a movie that intentionally set out to put a playful spin on familiar horror tropes, while Home Sweet Home seems content being a less-polished Thanksgiving-set Halloween. With that being said, if you are the type of person that likes low-budget slasher films from the 1980’s, then I implore you to check both out this holiday season. Both are truly awesome in their own weird ways.
Dust-covered VHS copies of both films still exist, but if you were to do a quick search on YouTube, you can find full versions to help get you through this year’s Thanksgiving. If you watch both back-to-back, then make sure to do an extra shot of gravy for me, champ.
Regardless of which movie you go with, I hope you end your holiday like I do, sitting on the floor of your kitchen, just like Louise Lasser, shoveling leftovers into your mouth with your bare hands and being thankful that both of these insane, grotesque films were ever created. Happy Thanksgiving!