Neo-Western Let the Corpses Tan offers rip-roaring action and liquid gold in spades

When I get my ass out of the house and drag myself to the local theater, I deserve something for my efforts. It’s too damn hot and I’ve got to interact with at least two separate people to do it. The way I see it, the filmmakers better be working their ass off for my fifteen bucks. Wife-and-husband team Hélène Cattet and Bruno Forzani are certainly either working their asses off or have sold their souls to Satan to create something this entertaining. 

Their most recent film Let the Corpses Tan (2017) is in a league of its own. If Alfred Hitchcock said 'What is drama but life with the dull bits cut out.' Then Hélène Cattet and Bruno Forzani would probably say ‘What is action but… blah blah blah don’t care.’ This is possibly the leanest film I’ve ever seen. Gotta tie a tourniquet? Just show the last half a second. You know what they did, why show it all? A heist happens in the movie but wouldn’t it be quicker and cooler to just show a bunch of guns and a pow-pow-pow-bang-bang?

Yes, of course there’s a heist. Complete with gold bars and a secret hideout for super cool criminals. The plot of this film is more of a means to an end than a plot. Somewhere in the film you sort of ascertain that there are a bunch or ruthless thieves that have robbed an armored truck and plan to hideout at an artist’s home in a picturesque setting in the middle of nowhere. On the way they run into some innocent bystanders and take them hostage. Police somehow stumble into the mist of this chaos and then some serious shit goes down.

The filmmakers don’t want to bore you for one second and they simply can’t. It’s impossible. Sure there is probably a lot of esoteric symbolism that someone has wasted an entire semester of college delving into. But again, blah blah blah don’t care, don’t need it. It works regardless of your formal education. It’s simply gross, razor-sharp fun.  

With all its merits, what this film truly excels at is its editing. Think Baby Driver on PCP. Everything that can be a match cut is a match cut. Wherever they can hide a cut, they do. And all for maximum impact. Open a door, bang! Bullet through the eye! They also have a highly structured dream logic to their edits and they stick to it. Nothing feels random, everything intentional. 

To illustrate my point, let’s examine my favorite death scene in the film. One of the bad dudes, who’s naked when the shootout starts, decides to steal the gold hidden in the trunk of the car. Suddenly, a bright light appears! He is blinded by the light and shots ring out. The gold turns to liquid as a bullet passes through it.

But the gold is actually his body being hit with bullets!

Cut back to the gold.

More splashing, more bullets!

His face is completely covered in gold as he is riddled with bullets.

Cut to a closeup bullet hole. His hairy skin is covered in gold blood. 

We venture inward to see the bullets’ trajectory through his body that is expressed as a beautiful red jelly. 

The final shot is a total switch as we see a shock of red before he falls to the ground. 

The whole scene is about seventeen seconds long. It has an absurdist Dada-esque quality. Where in Dadaism, the profound horrors of war are expressed through nonsensical repetition and abstraction, this film uses direct metaphor and rapid-fire images to express violence.  Personally I’m a fan of blood and guts violence. I loved when Robocop shot that guy in the dick. I love when Schwarzenegger rips Micheal Ironside’s arms off in Total Recall and says “See you at the party Richter!” This scene speaks to me on a basic level of absurdist surrealism that is highly satisfying. 

The whole film, in short, is an experience. It’s a very simple storyline and the rest is gravy on top. Gravy in the form of a woman who has breast milk that’s actually champagne and pisses out gold. So why would you want anything else in a film? Ten out of ten. No notes. Chef’s kiss. I’d like to thank Alamo Drafthouse for programming this film on a Weird Wednesday. It has made the last couple days of this week more bearable.