The vitals:
7:00 ~ Doors
7:30 ~ Pieces (1982)

In the wake of Halloween and Friday the 13th, the 1980s were dominated by slasher film hopefuls. Like many filmmakers of the era, Spanish director Juan Piquer Simón saw an opportunity to capitalize on a burgeoning genre with Pieces, a movie with TWO taglines: “You don’t have to go to Texas for a chainsaw massacre” and the hilarious, “It’s exactly what you think it is!” But trust me, whatever you think Pieces may be, you’re wrong.

On paper, it sounds simple. Young Timmy is assembling a puzzle of a nude woman, his mom understandably freaks out, and he quite unreasonably hacks her to bits with an axe, convincing authorities that he only witnessed the murder. 40 years later, a puzzle-obsessed maniac starts viciously dismembering students and faculty at a Boston university. What ensues is nonstop nonsensical dialogue, obvious red herrings, random Bruce Lee impersonators, and Lynda Day George shrieking “bastard” like it could bag her an Oscar. It feels like a baffling, sleazy attempt from a space alien to try and assimilate into the culture of the era, leading to an ending so crazy you’ll spend the next week wondering what happened. Pieces: You’ll never believe what it really is!

-Jackie Stargrove

SEE YOU AT THE MOVIES
🔮